The Waiting Game

When we started the adoption process, we were told there is no "average wait time" until a child comes into your home -- every situation is different. We were told that we would need to be patient but ready; things may look like they're not moving for months and then you get a phone call that literally changes your life. Hearing stories from others in the process, we knew it was best to take that advice to heart.

So it came as a surprise that Corey came to our home just a few short weeks after we became officially licensed. We had heard story after story of how long the process can take, yet here we were with a wonderful little boy basically as soon as they would let us. From there, the process went about as smoothly as one could hope. It felt a little like Corey was on the fast track to become a Jones (which was fine with us, of course).

We haven't been advertising it too much, but some of you know that we have told our agency we're ready for another placement. Yes, we've decided it's time for number four. Actually, that happened some months ago, probably around the beginning of the year.

With all of our expectations calibrated to Corey’s adoption, this second time around has thus far been a test of our patience. We’ve had a few calls with possible placements, but nothing has panned out so far (they can fall through for a number of reasons). We’ve even had the “we’ll be at your house tonight or tomorrow” phone call. That was a few weeks ago, and we’ve still not completely recovered from the experience. After waiting for that long, the emotional roller coaster was tough on both of us.

I’ve often wondered why the process for Corey went so (relatively) quickly. Why did God see fit to turn the wheels of bureaucracy that so often frustrate others? Why did he choose to spare us from all but the minimum of what can be a long and draining process? I honestly still don’t think I know why, though I do trust that His purposes were altogether good.

And now, in the midst of waiting, I’m also left wondering why. But instead of grumbling about it, I’ll simply ask that you pray for us. Here are specific prayer requests:

1. First, there is a child out there that needs us. We’ve chosen a path for adoption that saves children from environments that are nearly impossible for me to fathom. Pray then, for the safety of this child as she endures what will bring her to us.
2. Pray that God again moves the wheels and brings a child into our home quickly. Seeing some other families get placements has been especially difficult on Melissa.
3. It’s unbelievably hard to see sometimes, but we know that God’s timing is perfect. We need prayer for Godly patience – to wait when it is that He would have us wait.
4. Finally, we need to be content in the knowledge that the speed or ease of our endeavor is not a measure of its alignment with God’s perfect will. If he makes us wait two days or two years, His heart is so clearly beating for the orphans, the poor, and the marginalized. I don’t want Melissa or me to buy into the lie that says “if it’s difficult, God must not be with us.”